Opossum Stick

About 11:30pm last night I hear a bannging on my house and screeching, so I put my pistol on my side grab my flashlight, and flip on the floods. When I step out I see that it's three opossums trying to mate against my house for some reason. I step back inside and pick up my latest shillelagh and proceed out to scare the fornicators off. Before I even make it to where they are I see another up on the hill and two more coming across the yard. Now I'm in defense mode, looking all around and swinging trying to just scare these things off. All of them scatter except one, this guy weighed every bit of 15lbs and was not afraid of me at all. Usually they will run away or sometimes hiss, not this guy, he was spitting and lunging at me. I was thinking " Great this is how you get to be the idiot on TV who gets attacked by an opossum". He finally walks off and so do I. Not five minutes later they're all back at it, I'm not sure if anyone else has heard opossums mating, but it does not sound consensual. They all scatter when I come out and leave me and big boy to stare it off again untill he gives up and heads on. So thanks to being able to walk upright , the use of thumbs and most notably a crab apple stick, I thwarted the attempts of a few opossums to find love or whatever they do.

Mark